The last few weeks have been a time of reflecting and learning, refining and defining, and opening and expanding for me and my understanding of sexuality. I’ve been honoured to be attending workshops with world-renowned sex educator Midori, participating as an ally in the first ever Trans Pride March, stomping my feet with a local sex worker organization in the Dyke March, and then taking in bits and pieces of Toronto Pride.
My output has been a little lax lately and I seem to be in an “I want to learn” mode, particularly seeking opportunities to increase my knowledge, get into student mode and take it all in.
As I said recently at a work meeting, “more sex education is always welcome”.
While teaching the popular Rock His World workshop earlier this week, I shared my perspective on sex and learning: there is always more to learn. If any of us received any “official” sex education through the formal school system, it was most likely reproductive education, void of pleasure spots, orgasm how to’s, and creative ideas to heighten pleasure. Where are we supposed to learn about sex? When? How?
What about how some of us avoid even learning from ourselves, with ourselves (yes, masturbation included). Taking the time to get to know yourself is not seen as fruitful or worthwhile in many circles. More often seen as something “odd” or what other people do. In all of the hustle and bustle, how dare you take the time to touch yourself?
We have to learn how to ride a bike, boil and egg, sew a button or change a light bulb. Sometimes sex knowledge is assumed to be something we are born with or that will just happen ever so perfectly if we are with the right person. I might know the right person to go on a road trip with but we have to figure out who is going to drive and who is going to read the map and decide together if we are going to take the scenic route or the most efficient one.
Cheers to all of your road trips this summer!